Fragment #67 - Steve's letter

I push the door of the little café, down the road to my brother’s new flat. He managed to get his Erasmus spot in Glasgow University. My mum must be enraged. I smile at the thought. Here is Paul, waiting for me, holding Emma close. Those two are getting more and more involved as the time goes by. So Paul, you falling for the Glaswegian charms too?
“Hi, sis.”
“Hey, little bro’. Hi, Emma.”
“Hello, Charlie.”
“How are you guys?”

When I come home, later, Steve is not in. I’m not that much worried, until I find a letter on my computer keyboard.
My love,
It seems that, this time, it’s my turn to have to write to you instead of talking to you. It took me a while to actually figure what I really wanted to tell you. The main thing, you already know: I love you. With all my heart. More now than ever. But our trip to Dakar has got me thinking. Am I right for you? You need someone more adventurous who can manage to follow you in your crazy adventures. Someone who can actually help you, instead of staying behind, out of fear. Someone who won’t be ashamed to be a nobody when you take him to those fabulous dinners. I love you, honey. But I don’t fit in your life. I need time to think. I took a couple of days, and I went north, to see my parents. You’re going to hate me for it, I know. I’m sorry. I can’t really think when I’m in the flat, because I feel surrounded by you and your love. I feel so good when I’m with you, sweetheart, please, don’t forget that. This is not about me loving you or not!! It’s about me, and who I am. The simple me. The real me. I don’t want us to get more involved if I can’t face it. I would never forgive myself to hurt you.
Could you ever forgive me?
I love you.
Steve