Mesarthim Ink Star
Nombre de messages : 302 Date d'inscription : 09/04/2008
| Sujet: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears Mer Aoû 27, 2008 12:22 pm | |
| Wednesday, August 27th 2008 In Glasgow I wake up in a hurry. I'm late for work. The clock shows 7.30 am. I'm sweating, and hot. I had a nightmare again. I hurry to the bathroom to take a shower. Under the warm and reassuring water, I start remembering pieces of that dream. Pupils, lots of them. Talking, screaming, making a fuss during my class. I'm not dreaming anymore that I appear before them wearing my pyjamies as I used to do when doing my placements. But I still have dreams sometimes. Especially now, a new school year starting... What does it mean? That I'm afraid some would find me incompetent with the pupils? Afraid that I can't be in control all the time? When the hell would I understand that being a teacher means you can't expect things to be perfect all the time? That life in general can't be exactly the way you planned it... You need to improvise, and accept that a lot depends on others. I need not to expect too much. And not to be too afraid that things would go wrong. They're just youngsters for god's sake...
I wrap myself into a towel, go back in my room, choose a long dark skirt, a blue top, dark shoes. I brush my hair, tie them in a vague bun. Put some make-up on. I look at myself into the mirror. I need to grow up, and stop dreading everything. I know my job, I do it well, and they are just waiting for me to tell them to shut up. I'll do that. And be smashing good at what I do.
If only self- persuasion would work... Fuck. | |
|
Polaris Ink Star
Nombre de messages : 67 Age : 40 Location : Second star to the right. Either there or Glasgow Date d'inscription : 15/04/2008
| Sujet: Re: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears Mer Aoû 27, 2008 6:56 pm | |
| Poor girl. The problem is that the kids will probably smell the fear off her like a pack of wolves. I did when I was at school. I like the nervousness of the rhythm and the sympathy that comes from it. | |
|
Mesarthim Ink Star
Nombre de messages : 302 Date d'inscription : 09/04/2008
| Sujet: Re: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears Mer Aoû 27, 2008 11:17 pm | |
| And she knows they will :S People always notice nervousness. You must have been a dreadful pupil... Well I always found very pathetic though teachers losing their nerves in front of their class. I found they were caring too much about meaningless things... Thanks | |
|
Polaris Ink Star
Nombre de messages : 67 Age : 40 Location : Second star to the right. Either there or Glasgow Date d'inscription : 15/04/2008
| Sujet: Re: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears Jeu Aoû 28, 2008 6:24 am | |
| I was horrible to my teachers, but I think that's because I was bored. and most of the teachers I had were older and therefore much more inclined to the whole disillusionment thing. In saying that, I did have some very good teachers who did make an effort and did help out when I fell asleep in class, like my History teacher. He used to flick my ears to wake me up, he was a great man. | |
|
Mesarthim Ink Star
Nombre de messages : 302 Date d'inscription : 09/04/2008
| Sujet: Re: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears Jeu Aoû 28, 2008 11:20 am | |
| | |
|
Contenu sponsorisé
| Sujet: Re: Fragment #40 - Teacher's fears | |
| |
|